A letter from a mom to her son as he celebrates his senior year in high school

April is Alcohol Awareness Month. This letter to the editor comes from the Dubois County Coalition for Adolescent Resilience and Empowerment Strategies.

Dear Tim,

I can’t believe you’re almost finished with your senior year of high school.

Senior photos were taken months ago, you’ve had your last senior nights and sports banquets, and the presentation of your final class project is approaching fast.

Before you know it, you will be out of the house and on your own.

But first, you have to get through prom and graduation safely. We can’t just ignore these spring rituals and the parties that tend to come with them – and the alcohol that comes with so many of the parties. (I know you are rolling your eyes!)

Yes, we’ve been over all of this before, starting when you were in middle school, and I’m so glad you have chosen not to drink or use drugs. You’ve done everything right, and I am so proud of you. I guess I just want to be sure, at this late hour, that you know how important it is not to put all of your accomplishments on the line now. For my own peace of mind, I have to remind you of a few things.

You have earned your diploma and have looked forward to walking across the stage to receive it. Don’t put that in danger now.

Remember all that went into earning your soccer scholarship. Don’t risk it being rescinded. You’ve worked too hard for it – all of the practices and games and late hours afterward catching up on homework. 

There’s also your health to think of. Not just the health of your body, but also your brain health. As your brain is still developing, the intake of alcohol or drugs could change it in ways that would have long-term effects on memory and learning. Drinking can increase the risk for depression and anxiety.

Then there’s your physical safety. Drinking or taking drugs impairs judgment and lowers inhibitions. This leads to riskier behaviors, which could result in physical violence, sexual violence or a motor vehicle crash. Did you know that every year more than 4,000 young people die alcohol-related deaths?

Drinking is glamorized on television and social media, and I cannot count the number of times you’ve told me that “everybody’s doing it.” My response has always been, “No, they’re not.” Thanks to Dubois County CARES, I now have statistics to back me up: According to the 2024 Indiana Youth Survey, 20 percent of Dubois County seniors said they had drunk alcohol in the past month; that means 80 percent hadn’t! Drinking in high school is not the norm.

I know I don’t have to remind you that for anyone younger than 21, drinking alcohol is illegal. I-L-L-E-G-A-L. It could cause you trouble in the court system; being arrested for driving under the influence or physically hurting someone are just two examples.

You know about the local high school boys who branded one of their friends at a drinking party, but did I ever tell you about the teen who drowned in an area pond? That also happened at a gathering where minors were drinking. 

I know firsthand that peer pressure can be hard to resist. You want to fit in, and you fear that saying no will result in the loss of friendships. But think about it: If someone is pressuring you to drink alcohol, is that person really your friend? True friends support each other.

Remember your refusal skills: “No, thanks.” “I’m good.” “My mom will be waiting up for me (I will be!) so I can’t drink.” “Alcohol addiction runs in my family, so it’s a ‘No’ for me.”

Oh, son, we have practiced this so many times. And you’ve used these skills successfully so many times. Don’t let your guard down now. 

We’ve never had to use our “safe word” before, but it still stands. If you get in an uncomfortable situation and need help getting out of it, just text me that word and I’ll come pick you up, no questions asked.

I am so proud to be your mom. I love you so much.

p.s. You know there won’t be any alcohol at your graduation party. What you probably don’t know is that Dad and I have talked with the parents of your closest friends, and there won’t be alcohol at those parties, either. We don’t need liquor to celebrate how amazing you are!